18 Month Update

Ada had her 18 month appointment this morning. I know a lot of kids get upset about going to the doctor, but I always dread our visits because Ada has this crazy aversion ever since she had an ultrasound for her macrochephaly. And when we thought she swallowed a battery and had to take her to the ER -- well -- that X-ray solidified her hatred even more.

Thankfully this was just a routine visit + no shots on the schedule.

18 MONTH STATS

Height: 65th percentile, 32 inches
Weight: 15th percentile, 21 pounds, 8 ounces
Head: Even more off the charts, 19-3/4 inches, which I'll get to in a minute
Naps: 1, usually at 12PM to 2 PM for 2 hours
Breastfeeding: Weaned at 17 months exactly
Milk: Organic Whole Milk
Bedtime: 7:30, sleeps 12 hours most nights.


Favorite foods:
Tofu, beans, cherry tomatoes, strawberries, peanut butter, plain pasta, falafel, Goldfish, and peanut butter "cookies"

Dislikes:
Cheese, bread, sandwiches or assembled food of any kind, milk + eggs depending on the day

New words/phrases:
She says too many words to count now. Favorites are puppy, tractor, choo-choo, three, eggie, outside, and night-night. She also chimes in during the ABC song with D, G, P, S, V, X, and Z and sings the song to herself all the time. It's adorable.

Also notable is that she started using articles, like saying "A puppy" or "A tractor" when pointing things out. She has a few sentences, but still pretty basic like "Hi, Rivey!" to the cat or "Bye bye, GG" to her grandma. She has said "It's a fill-in-the-blank" a few times when we've asked what something is.

She can also count to three. How did this happen so fast?!


Favorite things:
Curious George, Play-Dough, her balance bike (though she's still a bit too small, she likes to ring the bell), play-dates + story time, offering her stuffed animals water, playing with her Yo Gabba Gabba dolls in my old playhouse.

Most of all: Being OUTSIDE! She would live out there if she could. So, I take her out all the time. We take walks in the stroller, go down to the park, and mostly just play in the backyard. Her favorite things to do outside are listen to our wind chimes, pull up dandelions, and dig in the dirt. Oh, and every Wednesday she loves watching the garbage and recycling trucks.

Yup. She's pretty fun these days.


I mentioned that Ada's head is still a concern. After her 15 month appointment I thought we were in the clear. But it's increased enough that we actually are waiting on an appointment with a children's hospital an hour away to get an MRI scan. Ada will have to be sedated for the procedure, and -- along with everything else that's been going on lately -- I just started crying at the doctor office this morning.

When I say Ada has hospital anxiety, I don't mean this lightly. The doctor confirmed that she's a little LOT more sensitive than other kids in this regard. So, having testing will be very difficult . . . on all of us. I wish she didn't need to be sedated, but I know that if we tried it without, it simply wouldn't work. Her doctor and I both agreed on this.

So, I guess for now I'm trying my best not to worry, chat with Dr. Google, and just hope somehow she inherited my dad's big head. As much as I'm dreading the whole thing, I'll be happy to put my concerns to rest once we can finally know something more.

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What Labor Feels Like

Have you guys seen this video of men experiencing (simulated) labor pains?

It's so weird. Labor. Delivery. I remember it like it was yesterday, but the actual feelings and sensations have definitely dulled over time. I know it hurt like hell. And this might sound super strange, but I feel like I remember the absolute worst of it more in colors.

Like the most intense parts? I just see WHITE.

OK. That is a strange way to explain what labor feels like. And I know labor + delivery took a while, but I was so inside myself, when I think back to that day, it's difficult to quantify. It started in the morning . . . and before I knew it, I was at the hospital almost fully dilated and effaced.

When I read back on my birth story (part 1 + part 2), I quickly discover how my memory has faded.

So, when my friends pregnant with baby number 1 ask me: "What did labor feel like?" question, I get sort of stumped. I've received this question from readers, too. So, I thought it might be fun to post about it.


The best way I can describe what labor feels like, if I really, really, really reach back and remember? I suppose for me it started with intestinal cramps. The kind you get when you have really bad diarrhea. The kind that make you double over . . . and you might not realize you're actually in labor because it's not a sensation you haven't felt before. It's just unpleasant. But when you try to go to the bathroom and nothing happens, well, they might get worse.

And you're in labor. Those feelings get closer together and you really notice a really intense tightening along with them. Like a vice grip over your entire mid-section. It takes your breath away, but comes + goes.

All the while, though, it's nothing you haven't really felt before . . . it's just a lot of the worst, all at the same time if that makes sense. I suppose the scariest part for me with going into labor was this PAIN everyone talked about. How it's like nothing they had experienced before.

I promise you if you choose a med-free delivery, it is going to be painful. I can't debunk those orgasmic births that I've read about . . . but if you are a woman who had an orgasm during birth, I'd like to chat with you. Thing is, that pain that everyone talks about being so horrific? It's not THAT bad. It's manageable if you can just give in to it.

At least for me, giving in meant not having lots of people in the room. Instead, I wanted to be alone. Rocking back and forth, shower water pelting my lower back, and getting inside my head helped. Watching those baby shows my whole pregnancy made me feel like I should be some fantastic host, smiling my way through contractions while my second cousin goes out and gets the family pizza to feast on at my bedside.

Not like that. At all. And just when those intestinal cramps and the tightenings start to get too much. Just when you think you need to give up, you realize that you're likely almost there. Delivery for me didn't really hurt more than labor, it was just different. It was almost relief because I knew it would be over soon.

But I'm just focusing on labor. That's what labor felt like to me: Really wicked bad intestinal/period cramps and tightness like being in a vice grip.  

What did it feel like for you? If you had to sum up the pain in a sentence or two?

(Thank you so much for all your kind words about my family + health issues + bad mother's days + the like. My dad is still in the hospital, but life is getting somewhat back to normal. We're looking forward to a recovery and just getting back into the normal swing of things. You are all wonderful and I'm so happy to "know" you.)

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Mother's Day

Do you ever feel like everyone is having an exceptional day except you?

My Mother's Day was terrible. I actually had to completely disconnect from Facebook + Twitter + Instagram all day because the happy photos and stories streaming in were making me angry. It feels good to get that out there. Compared to eating breakfast in bed, picking colorful flowers, frolicking in a sunny park, and dressing up for cute photos with my child . . . my day sucked. Even for a normal Sunday.

Forced smiles as Ada squirms out of my arms.

I hope you understand this blog isn't taking a turn for the rant/vent side of the internets. It's just a rough patch, I promise you. Without going into too much detail, my dad has been in the hospital for a solid week +  will continue to stay there for at least another. The back + forth is draining. And then I got a call early Sunday morning that my family's (parents') dog's legs stopped working and we had to rush him to the vet and, shortly after, put him down.

Sid's departure sort of consumed the day with sadness. In my almost-30 years, I've never had to help make that decision. Then my mom started getting some health issues of her own and, as of this morning, BOTH of my parents were in the hospital, though my mom is much better and is being discharged soon. My brother lives 6 hours away, so I've been a bit on my own with all this mess.

Not that I'm really complaining. It's just, well, a load of stress.

So, I don't have a recap about how fantastically magical my weekend was this week. I made a tasty dessert that I posted on (never)homemaker this morning. I got a new pair of shoes I've been eying for months. Stephen and I had a date-night complete with dinner and drinks. My mother-in-law stayed with me all last week to help out, which was great, and we planted a succulent garden I hope to write about soon.

We did sneak out for a late brunch. Though my eggs were horribly over-cooked (which wouldn't matter much, except they were poached and my absolute favorite usually), that mimosa really hit the spot. Ada was an absolute doll yesterday, too. I love her so much. Yea. It hasn't all been bad, but -- holy moly -- when it rains it pours.

And today it's actually SNOWING, but I'm hesitant to add that to my list of concerns.

OK. I just slapped myself in the face. Well, figuratively, but maybe I'll actually do it for good measure. There. Ouch. If you had a glorious mother's day, please know that I'm over my bad attitude and I'm genuinely happy for you!

I'm thinking a rain (snow?) date is in order over here.

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